OMG-PD: Helicopter Pursuits, Smashing Pumpkins
Plus: hanky-panky in the Princeton U-Store, drunken kids partying in the woods, and a cancer fraud in this week's round-up of wacky NJ police blotter items.
Each week, Patch combs through the more shocking, surprising and often absurd alleged criminal acts and police-related incidents that unfold throughout New Jersey. Here’s what went on this week for “OMGs from NJ PD.”
A Different Kind of Store Credit: A bookstore employee reportedly put the “rowr” in the Princeton University Tigers, police say, by cavorting with an accused prostitute after-hours in the on-campus shop. Eric Everett, 23, of Bordentown, a U-Store employee for several years, allegedly hired Brittany Smith, 20, of Keyport, through Craigslist. The two hit the books in the back of the store multiple times, according to Princeton Borough Police. Both also reportedly helped themselves to postcoital snacks without paying back the store. That’s probably not their main concern now, though. Everett and Smith were both slapped with multiple charges, including prostitution, and drug offenses for her.
Jumping While Intoxicated: Parents may not like it, but it’s a common rite of passage to drink in the woods as a teenager. But a group of South Brunswick High School students took the tradition to fiery new heights recently with a drinking-bonfire-trampoline party, police say. The party could have ended with much worse than a police bust, however. One teen was charged with drunken driving and another was found passed out near the gathering. Underage drinking charges could mean no license until they’re 18, police report. Any partygoers so charged have only themselves to blame.
Dozing Driver: Speaking of things that could have ended worse… Cedar Grove Police responded in time to end a dicey situation recently. Officers found Craig Anderson, 22, of Little Falls, asleep at the wheel with his car in gear. Shocking no one, police say Anderson was drunk.
Points for Creativity?: A Manchester teen made like cat burglar, or maybe a termite, and reportedly bored through an attic wall to steal jewelry from a neighbor. The unnamed 17-year-old, who lives with his mom in the adjoining residence, apparently didn’t want to take credit for his resourceful entry—charges include falsely implicating another person in the crime.
A Bad Time to Believe in Karma: This is pretty much as low as you can get. Police say a Delran woman not only faked bladder cancer, but bilked concerned friends, family and strangers out of cash from her phony diagnosed to her "miracle" recovery. Supporters chipped in thousands of dollars—and an entire wedding—for Lori Stilley, 40. Stilley even penned an e-book on the ordeal before her alleged lies came crashing down around her, just as she was set to enter hospice.
Major Search for Alleged Perp: A domestic violence case took an even more sinister turn in Lawrence Township after authorities had to track the suspect through the woods in a three-hour hunt. Police say Thomas Fell, 44, assaulted his mother and cut himself superficially across the throat before fleeing into the woods. Unsure what they were dealing with and what Fell’s mental state was, police were cautious and used dogs, helicopters and thermal imaging to track down Fell and remove him safely from the woods.
Guilty Conscience: A couple of kids seemingly pegged Krauszer's Food Store in Liberty Corner as an easy burglary mark. Bad move. During the third overnight burglary in a week, Bernards Township Police brought out the muscle and took to the skies to look for the suspects. That freaked out the suspects enough that two of them contacted police on their own about the break-ins, which reportedly netted the thieves cigars and cash.
It’s the Great Pumpkin Grinch, Charlie Brown: We may be mixing our beloved holiday cartoon metaphors, but that’s a less serious crime than whoever is smashing pumpkins in Montclair. Vandals are demolishing pumpkins repeatedly at Charles. H. Bullock Elementary School, the principal reports. And not just any pumpkins, but ones the students are growing themselves. Come on, Montclair pumpkin Grinch, have a heart and let the kids have their gardening fun.
All information comes from the police department named. An arrest is not a conviction.